January 10, 2002

With Jon Stewart

"Welcome to the Daily Show, folks. I have to apologize before we get started. Unfunny yellow [script] found its way into my funny blue script. Tonight's show, oh man, we got headlines, we have a thing there on airport security that when we first wrote it we said 'oh, that's not good', and then we wrote it again, and said 'now it's good.'.  Uh, we got commercials, then we're going to go into uh, your good friend Jack Black will be here, and then we have Lewis Black and then we got commercials. Some closing thoughts, zen, credits, probably cow goes moo, there's your show, and then of course there's uh...you know Michelob. I'm sorry, I forgot I'm not supposed to say the drinking stuff out aloud, am I? I was supposed to say, 'and after that, you kiss your children and stay in school.'

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